How to Tell My Husband About How Much Debt We Have

Hidden debt is a difficult topic for couples to discuss as it often initiates negative emotions along with feelings of hurt, betrayal and distrust. While it may be tempting to try to remedy hidden debt on your own, the stress and continuation of hiding facts regarding personal finances will eventually take their toll and often result in deeper debt. Additionally, when you accept the responsibility to discuss the details of your financial affairs upfront and honestly, the chances of a positive outcome are greater.

Instructions

How to Discuss Hidden Debt

1

Write down the details of all accounts, debts, and outstanding bills for reference.

2

Determine a time with your spouse to sit down and discuss your personal finances. Allow for several hours, and make sure this will be uninterrupted time.

3

Prepare to be asked difficult questions. "Why?" is the most common question. Usually, embarrassment and feelings of inadequacy are often the reason why. Just be honest.

4

Stay positive throughout the discussion. Be prepared for your spouse to become angry and experience a significant amount of hurt.

5

Ask for forgiveness and refrain from sharing how bad you feel. Your spouse is under quite a bit of shock and would not be very receptive of your feelings at the moment.

6

Maintain the fact that you would like to work together to resolve matters as a team, and ask to discuss what options you have. Selling personal property or real estate may be one option to consider.

7

Offer to go to credit counseling together. Your spouse may demand that the responsibility of your financial affairs be turned over to him or her. Respect this request.